Goal Reached

I reached my goal :) I am feeling back to normal again. It's still slightly weird to be in this dorm, but I am much more used to it now, and I love my roommates. I still miss everyone a lot, but I am feeling happy and bubbly and back to my old self again. Just so many great things have happened this week that I feel so bubbly now. I planted seeds in my little flower pot next to my window and they are starting to sprout! I have so many little shoots of green now! I'm afraid though that I might have drowned them this morning because I think added way too much water. I hope they survive the flood.

I also saw President Uchtdorf in the BYU bookstore the other day! It was so cool! I have never been that close to an apostle before, and President Uchtdorf is my favorite! I didn't get to talk to him, but I walked right past him on my way out the store, and he smiled and nodded at me! I was practically skipping the whole way home.

I am also loving my classes. They cancelled my country dance class (not enough people enrolled) but I am in World Dance I and II and it is so much fun! I am learning about folk dances from all over world. I'm learning dances from Armenia, Norway, England, and Croatia. And I got into a religious class about Joseph Smith and the early years of the church. It is so fascinating! I am learning so many cool things I never new about Joseph Smith and I am loving it!

Well I don't really know what else to say, so I will end here. Have a good Sunday!

All moved in

Well Winter Semester is officially over. My roommates are gone, my friends are gone, my ward is gone, I'm all moved out of my old dorm, and all moved in to my new dorm. Last Friday was one of the longest and hardest days I have ever experienced. I won't go into much detail, but just know that I had to say goodbye to a lot of awesome people. I now live in New Heritage and it is huge! We have two closets, the kitchen has SO many cupboards, we actually have a living room for once, there are two bathrooms, and over all there is just a lot more space. There are some drawbacks though. Where are we supposed to put our bathroom stuff? There are no cupboards or cabinets in the bathroom. And we don't really have closets in our room so very little place to store things in our room and there are no mirrors in our room. So there are pros and cons to living here. I think I am going to eventually like it and my roommates are super nice so I'm sure I will have fun. But right now it just feels so weird to be here. Everything is unpacked and my walls are decorated, but it doesn't feel like home the way my old dorm did.

Last year, I felt the same way about my old dorm. I felt uncomfortable there and lonely and like I didn't belong, but eventually I came to love the place and it literally became my home. Lexi and I stopped saying "okay I'm heading back to the dorm" and started saying "okay I'm heading home." It feels so weird to be here and to know that I can't ever go back, that it isn't my home anymore, that next year different girls will be living there. It is a really really strange and sad feeling. I know that I will probably feel the same about this dorm at the end of the semester, but right now, I've just barely moved in and I don't feel like I belong yet.

And classes don't even start until Tuesday, and even then, the only class on Tuesday I have is my dance class, so the next couple of days are sure to be LONG days. I just want the semester to start so I can lose myself in homework. I'm actually really craving homework that way I can have something to keep my mind off of the fact that I've lost everything from last semester.

Well I've tried to make this post seem not too sad. I really am grateful for so many things. I'm grateful for the best year of my life, and I'm grateful for another two semesters to make more friends and have even more fun. I'm grateful that my new roommates seem so nice and I am grateful that this new building is safer than the last one. I don't feel like it is going to topple to the ground. I'm thankful for the help I received yesterday moving out and moving in. And I'm thankful for all the little things that God has placed in my life to make it more bearable. Coming to BYU really was the best decision I ever made.

Oh and if anyone is still around/nearby and wants to come visit in this upcoming week, please do! I'm going to be very bored I think.

Saying Goodbye to a Great Year

It's the last week of winter semester. It's also finals week so yes I am stressed. But I think the hardest part about this week is having to say goodbye to everyone. I have made some of the greatest friends here at college. I have learned so much from them and they have made me feel so loved and I can't stand the thought of never seeing some of them again. I thought last semester was hard when we had to say goodbye to half of our FHE brothers, but now that we've lived through another semester, there are certain people I've gotten even closer to and it breaks my heart to have to say goodbye. And it frustrates me because there is so much I want to say to people but I just can't put my feelings into words. The English language really corrupts what you are feeling. And I am really awkard at saying goodbye. After someone leaves, I usually break down and start crying, but while I am saying goodbye to them, I'm really quiet and barely say anything other than "goodbye" and it sounds so awkward.

One thing I have learned though is that the hard times in our lives are put there to make the good times seem even greater, even sweeter. Growing up I had a hard time making friends, or at least making good friends, and so now that I have these wonderful friends, it makes the experience even greater to contrast it to what my friendships used to be like. I am able to really appreciate the experiences I have had here. Another example, one of my favorite memories of last semester started off as one of the most stressful nights last semester. I was so stressed out and upset, but then someone came to my rescue and the contrast between the before and after was so great that it made the experience so much sweeter and it became one of my favorite memories of last semester. It's why we love fairy tales so much, because the "Happily Ever After" is only sweet and triumphant because the story plot was so treacherous. If everything was happy and smooth sailing, we would be bored and the ending wouldn't mean much to us. So the times when we are most upset or stressed are the times when we are battling a dragon or we are locked in a tower, and someday we will have our happily ever after. In fact we see little pieces of it every day. So I thank God for all the wonderful experiences I have had this year, and I thank him for all the bad experiences I have had as they make the good ones even greater.

My Dorm Smells Like Butter

My roommate is making Greek cookies and they require two pounds of butter. Needless to say, our dorm smells a lot like butter.

Well last week was fantastic! My mom came on Monday and she spent the whole week with me. We did a lot of shopping and eating and we visited my cousin's house and I got ballroom dance shoes for my birthday present. Then Friday the rest of my family came up and we spent the weekend together. Again we did a lot of eating, and we went bowling and I got my very first ever strike -extremely shocking- and we saw Divine Comedy and ate a five-minute Easter Dinner Saturday night and then saw the Ballroom Dance Concert- which was so amazing! Sunday morning, I got up to watch the sunrise with the girls in my ward and then I went back to bed until my family came and they made me Crepes for my birthday. They went to Sacrament Meeting with me, but they had to leave right after that. I loved having them there for my birthday.

My roommates continued to make my birthday special by singing to me pretty much every time I walked in the dorm and they made me a cake, even though I had already made cupcakes, and yesterday they made me brownies also in celebration of my birthday. We have so much junk food now. We have like four cartons of ice cream, cake, brownies, cookies, and cupcakes. And my roommates are making more cookies and two more cakes tonight. Oh dear...

But my birthday was so great. I have never had this many people tell me Happy Birthday before. For the past couple of years, people always forget it's my birthday despite the fact that I start talking about it a month in advance and keep talking about it until the day before. But this year pretty much everyone I saw wished me a happy birthday. I felt so loved! It was one of the best birthdays I've ever had. And it was on Easter!

Well today was pretty much my last day of classes. The only class I have tomorrow is Dance and we are having a party, so I'm pretty much all done. Then I just got to worry about Finals. I'm going to do what I did last time again and not eat ice cream or get on facebook while Finals are going on. I've also got to worry about getting all of my things packed up for Spring term. Everything has to be moved out of my dorm by 10am Saturday morning next week, but I can't move it into my new dorm until the afternoon. But they are letting us put our things in the central building during the time in between. Well that's just great. For those of you who don't know, the central building is kind of far to be carrying that much stuff. I'm probably going to be making a bazillion trips back and forth. And all of my roommates leave that Thursday, so I'm also going to be alone for two days until I move into my new dorm. : (

I'm excited for a new semester, for the change and all, but I am seriously going to miss my roommates and my ward. This semester has been so much fun, way more fun than last semester. I have really been blessed. Thank you to everyone who has made this year so great. Good luck with finals!

What I have learned this semester

First I have to say, wasn't General Conference wonderful?! I loved it! So beautiful. My favorite talk was Neal A. Anderson's about the three kids that were trapped in the ruined building after the earthquake in Haiti and the father prayed that at least one of his children would be alive and then they heard a baby crying and then they heard his son singing "I am a Child of God" and they dug through the wreck and found all three children still alive. BEAUTIFUL! I was literally bawling. My roommate came in the room to find me sobbing. I turned to her with tears running down my cheeks and cried "you just missed the most beautiful talk."

It has been a good week for me as far as spiritual experiences go. I went to the temple on Friday and it was so peaceful and so beautiful and I was able to really put my life in perspective. I walked out of the temple beaming and humming. And then we had General Conference. It's just been great.

During the week it was kind of stressful because I had a lot to do. I had Geology, English, and Spanish tests. I had an English project. I had my medals exam for Dance. I had a Book of Mormon essay. I went to the induction banquet for Phi Eta Sigma...yeah busy. But I'm not sick of school yet, which is good since I will be staying for Spring and Summer terms.

I just wanted to talk about some of the things I have learned at BYU so far though. You know, as far as life lessons go. Because as I am coming to the close of my first year at BYU, I have been looking back at who I was when I first came here, and how much I have changed, how much I have learned. There's the basic things, like how to live on my own, how to cook my own food, how to live with roommates...but it's more than that. I've learned to absolutely love my roommates. I've learned that some things really aren't that big of a deal. I've learned that mistakes happen, and you shouldn't be afraid of making choices and making risks just because there is a chance that you might fail. If you want to do something, you should go for it, and then if it doesn't work out, then you learn from it. My dear roommate Becca has taught me this.

I've also learned that the saying "you can do anything" isn't true. I definitely cannot do "anything" I  want on my own. But with the Lord's help, I can. I should always trust in the Lord and he will get me through. He always has. My testimony has grown so much this semester as I have learned to rely on the Lord in everything. I have learned also that every day is a bad day...but every day is a good day. Every day something is going to go wrong, and you can choose to be pessimistic and ungrateful. But the Lord always gives us something each day to be thankful about, and as long as we remember that the Lord loves us and we count the blessings in our lives, every day becomes a good day.

I have learned, thanks to a friend of mine, that mornings are a gift from God. I have learned that I love geology and I now want to major in it. I have learned to love and appreciate simply learning. Getting an education is so important, and you should not limit yourself to learning only what you think you want to learn. Take new classes, explore other options, and just appreciate the ability you have to learn.

I have also learned that part of getting an education is being involved in activities. When I graduate, I do not want to just walk away from BYU with a diploma. I want to have become a better person. I want to have made a difference. I want to soak up my experience here. When I was in high school, my focus was all on grades, and I joined very little clubs because I was afraid they would interfere with my homework. I have learned here how to prioritize and manage my time so that it is possible to do other things than homework. This is why I am in dance, I am in clubs, I am in Phi Eta Sigma, I go to dances, I do service projects, and why I want to do Study Abroad, eventually be a part of the women's choir, serve in a leadership position in Phi Eta Sigma, and maybe in a few years I can join a Ballroom Dance team. That may seem like a lot, but I will take things one at a time. Because, as I said, I am going to soak up my experience here at BYU. I am not just going to get a diploma. I am going to get an education and become someone.

One of the other things I would like to share that I have learned, although it is kind of personal, I feel it can apply to many people. In high school, I did not feel like I had very many friends. Of the friends I had, I didn't feel included. I tried really hard to be their friends, and while some of them were really great, many more of my friends I just felt like I was trying to gain their approval. Then I came to BYU and I made the greatest friends I could ever ask for. It was as if the Lord was saving me for these friends. During high school, I wondered why it was so hard for me to make friends and why I wasn't included. But if I had known that I was going to make such great friendships in college, it would have made it totally worth it. It DID make it worth it. I just didn't know it at the time in high school. A lot of things are like that in life. Dating is the same way. Again, I wasn't asked out on dates very much, and I'm still not. But it's okay, because I know the Lord is just saving me for the right person. He has plans for me in the meantime. The Lord has plans for all of us. So if you ever feel like, why is this not working out? Why can't I make any friends? Why won't anyone ask me on a date? Remember, you are loved by the Lord and something great is in store for you. That's my thought for the day.