Charity Never Faileth

Before entering the MTC, Satan put lots of doubts in my mind to try to stop me from what I was about to do. One by one I overcame them all, I said goodbye to my comfort zone and family, and I left everything behind as I began the hardest, but most wonderful 18 months of my life. But Satan didn’t stop putting doubts into my mind though once I entered the walls of the MTC. I began to have a new fear: What if I could never love the people on my mission? What if I was incapable of feeling such love for another person? What if there was something wrong with me and I was unable to feel charity?

That is what I want my blog post to be on today. The lesson I learned about charity.

At the ending of my time in the MTC, a story was recounted of three boys in the Martin Handcart company who carried women across an icy river of water to save them and bring them to safety. And if I remember the story correctly, they don’t do this just once but three times. They were so concerned about the lives of others and saving them, that they completely forgot themselves. Later, all three died as a result of the cold water. But they will forever be remembered in history. They had been true heroes.

I heard that story and thought “I want to be like that. I want to be like those three boys and be so selfless. I am about to cross a river as I enter the mission field. But do I have the courage that those boys had? I want to have charity like that, but I don’t know if I do.”

I made it to the field and quickly realized that I was completely able to love these people. How could you not love another when you are serving? How could you not love someone when you pray for them every night and study for them every morning and every Thursday make plans on what you can do to help them progress in the Gospel? How could you not love someone when you sit with them in their house and hear how hard their life is and how much they are struggling, and together you read the Book of Mormon and help them feel the Spirit and remember their true worth as a child of God? How could you not love them when the Spirit is so strong, it testifies to you that God loves them and he has great things in store for that person? How could I not love them?

But I will admit, sometimes it is hard to have charity and be patient. There were times when I would plead with the Lord, “Help me Lord have charity for this person, because I really want to give them a piece of my mind, but I don’t think that would be a very sister-missionary-like thing to do.”

And so I began my extensive search in the scriptures to understand Charity and how we obtain it.

I discovered my answer in 1 Corinthians 13. Since I had already been studying in depth Chapter 6 in Preach My Gospel about the Christlike Attributes, things started popping out at me in these following verses that I had never noticed before. I have in parentheses the impressions that I got while reading.

“4. Charity suffereth long (PATIENCE) and is kind, charity envieth not, charity vaunteth not itself, is not puffed up (HUMILITY).

5. Doth not behave itself unseemly, seeketh not her own (OBEDIENCE), is not easily provoked, thinketh no evil (VIRTUE);

6. Rejoiceth not in iniquity, but rejoiceth in the truth (KNOWLEDGE)

7. Beareth all things (PATIENCE AGAIN), believeth all things (FAITH), hopeth all things, (HOPE), endureth all things (DILIGENCE)

I realized why Charity is the most important of all the attributes of Christ, and why without charity we are nothing. Because Charity is ALL of the attributes of Christ in one. It is being patient, being humble, being obedient, having virtue, rejoicing in knowledge, having faith, having hope, and being diligent. That is charity.

And how do we get it? By praying with all of the energy of heart. For it is a gift. We do not just decide one day “I have charity.” God must give it to us. So we must be worthy of that gift and we must ask for it. We should not just pray once a week or a day to have charity. We should not just pray halfheartedly for charity. But we should pray with all the energy of heart for the Lord to give that gift to us.

I did love the people on my mission, and as I did all I could do and tried to give up my will for the Lord’s, the charity came. I have never cried so hard as I have on my mission. Why? Because I was hurting to see others in such pain. I have never felt so disappointed and devastated on my mission then to see someone who I loved decide to no longer continue investigating the church. I have never felt such exquisite joy then on my mission to see someone enter the waters of baptism and say “I know that this is the true church. I know that I am supposed to be baptized.”

Sometimes it can be quite exhausting and frustrating to love someone so much. At one point in my mission, I started thinking, what is the point of all of this? What was the point in teaching that person and helping them get to church and feel the spirit when now they want nothing to do with the church and won’t answer the door? Why did we have to go through those wonderful times, and learn to really love this person, only for it to end in tragedy? What was the point of us teaching that person and serving them and loving them?

But why did Christ make Judas an apostle when He knew that someday Judas would betray him too? Why did Christ teach and serve the people of Jerusalem when he knew that they would in the future crucify him? Christ knew that they would betray him, yet he stilled served them. He still offered them a chance. He still loved them.

That is why we serve. That is why we do everything we do as missionaries. Yes, many people will never accept our message. But we teach them anyways, because we love them and we need to show them that we love them. It is not enough to love. To be charitable, you must prove that love.

Through that charity, God has taught me some of the sweetest lessons on how much He loves us. For if I can weep and plead with God that He save this person’s life and not condemn them for any mistakes they make, how much more does God love them?

God loves us so much. I know that He loves us. I know He loves me and all of the people on my mission. I love the people on my mission, with a love I didn’t know I could possess. And I know that as we pray for God’s help, He will help us to love those around us and He will show us why He loves us. In the name of Jesus Christ, Amen.